A list of things you really shouldn’t name your boat.


Posted on April 8th, by Jack in Articles, Blog Posts, JackMcMan.us Blog. No Comments

The following is a list of awful names that were actually taken from the BoatUS custom lettering website, which many boaters use to physically create the decal that becomes their boat’s name. In an attempt to help new boat owners with their brainstorming, the BoatUS website features a huge, alphabetically-sorted list of thousands of possible names. And some of them are just astounding.

I admit some of these are funny, but I think I can speak for everyone when I say please, for the love of god and decency, do not give your boat any of the following names: 

  • Ahoy Vey
  • Aft Oar Ours
  • Ambivilance
  • Aphrodisyacht
  • BASS KISSER
  • BABY OVERBOARD
  • big tool the milf man
  • BLOOD SWEAT AND MONEY
  • Boatzilla
  • BOBBY HULL
  • BREAKING WIND
  • Captain Stabbin
  • Cheeks & Thong
  • Chicken Of The Sea
  • Cirrhosis of the River
  • CRIME PAYS
  • Current Wife
  • Deez Knots
  • Farfrompuken
  • Father’s Mercy
  • Fish Paste
  • floating beer keg
  • Frying Nemo
  • GALLEY SLAVE
  • High Jack
  • HOBOAT
  • Hot Ruddered Bum
  • Hope It Floats II
  • Humphrey Boatgart
  • In Deep Ship
  • INXS
  • I AM JUSTIN
  • Jack’s Off
  • Knot His
  • Liquid Explosion
  • MO’ RON
  • My Boat!
  • My Dixie Wrecked
  • QWERTY
  • Sea Donkey
  • Sinking Feeling
  • The Hairy Mullet
  • Titanic
  • Tow Fetish
  • Tuna Colada
  • U.S.S. Ducktape
  • Welfare Fraud
  • Zoloft

The entries on this master list seem to be submitted by their members, using a form attached to the bottom of the page. On one hand, this is disappointing because it means there may not be actual boats with these names out there, but overall it would probably be better if these boats only exist in trollish imaginations.

Source: BoatUS 





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